Your Aunt Jezebel
Can I let you in on a little secret? Well... it's not so much of a secret. I was a MAJOR party whore before I met your new uncle and, honestly, I don't know if I'm ready to give that up. I know that's a bad thing to say right before your wedding but... I can't get over this feeling that I'm going to miss it. You know, going out and talking to cute guys, maybe taking one - or two - back home with me.
It's not that I don't love him or that I wouldn't give it up for him, but it's just going to be a big change, you know? And it's all happening so suddenly... I wish I just had one more night to do something REALLY crazy and then I could put it all aside for him.
Fucking my own nephew? You mean... In...? Well... I suppose that DOES fit the "crazy" bill... and that giant bulge in your pants is making me think maybe you're the right guy for the job, little nephew.
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